Sunday, 29 November 2020

Rotary Club of Maleny Bulletin for 2nd December 2020

 "THE RANGE"  Vol. 63 No.11


Maleny Hotel at 6:30 for 7:00pm with Guest Speaker Joanne Turner on Park Run.

Apologies please to Bernice before noon on Tuesday.

                        2nd Dec          16th Dec    
Duty Officer      Sherryl G        James McC  
Assist DO           Roly N            Chris B                
Registration      Keith R            Peter McG
Fellowship        Malcolm B       John W     

12th December
0730 -1030  Rick V   Chris R-S   Brian A

1030 - 1330  Greg W  TBA   TBA

16th January

1. It is great to hear that Malcolm B is back home from hospital with Nancy, and we all pray for his speedy recovery.

2.Domestic and Family Violence collaboration with Zonta, Quota, and Lions Clubs
(a) Auspicing Agreement and MOU
A draft MOU and Auspice Agreement is being circulated to collaborating partners and Board members of Rotary for comment and approval.
(b) Refurbishment of the Bench Seat outside the Maleny Neighbourhood Centre
A 4L tin of grey primer undercoat has been purchased and supplied to the Maleny Neighbourhood Centre for application to a timber bench seat to be located at the front of the Centre. The balance of the red paint left over after Malcolm B painted the Red Bench at the Maleny Post Office will also be used.
An official opening of the second Red Rose Foundation seat in Maleny is scheduled for noon at the Maleny Neighbourhood Centre on 17 December.

3. Foundation Seminar on 8 November

I was a very proud President of a contingent of 6 lively Rotarians from Maleny at what was the last Foundation Seminar for District 9600 before we merge to be part of District 9620, and have enclosed some photos for perusal.

4. Alan W’s prototype Market Kart
It was a privilege to accompany Alan to the Surfers Sunrise Club on the 14th November to celebrate the Surfers Sunrise club’s 25 year project to make and distribute over 10,000 wheelchairs to people in need of mobility and independence in over 60 countries around the globe.

We were taken on a tour of their fabulous workshop at Arundell and also met up with some of the teachers and students from the Gold Coast hinterland who are also involved in this great humanitarian project.  Our own Chris B has continued to make an enormous personal contribution to this project through the collection of bikes on the Sunshine Coast hinterland, their dismantling and subsequent transport initially to Surfers Paradise but also to Gladstone at his cost. We were also shown improved mobile housing pods based on the original prototype that we displayed at the Hinterland Aussie Day Expo earlier this year.

Interestingly, representatives from the Surfers Sunrise Club informed us that they have entered into arrangements to place the mobile sleeping pods at a local church for use by homeless persons who can also use them to store their valuables during the day. A great local low cost initiative to provide basic shelter for homeless people.
Alan W received some very encouraging remarks about the wide variety of uses to which his Market Kart prototype could be put and it was left at the club for further evaluation. I am certain we will hear further responses from Surfers Sunrise in the near future.

 I was also able to catch up with my cousin Ian Hodge who with his partner Robyn Burton had made arrangements to also donate to the Surfers Sunrise Club the wheelchair of their 16 year old adopted son Elijah – which he had outgrown – and which the club will sell to raise funds for their Wheelchair Project. Elijah is training to represent Australia at the 2024 Paralympic Games in Paris.

5. Induction of Peter McQuoid
I am looking forward to the induction of Peter at our next meeting. I know that Peter will be an enthusiastic and outstanding Rotarian, and hope members’ partners are also able to join with us in celebrating his induction to our Club and our worldwide Rotary Family.

6. Shelter Box Award 
Last Tuesday evening, it was my honour and privilege to represent our Club to receive a Bronze ShelterBox Champion Award at the 2020 Champion Award Virtual (Zoom) Ceremony that brought clubs together from all over Australia to celebrate the success of providing shelter to families in need.  Our Club was of a few Clubs from our district to receive an award, the others being Nundah,Karana-Bellbowrie,Samford Valley and Caboolture.

7. Website and Facebook Changes
A huge thanks to Phillip S and his team on the changes underway to remake and renew our website and Facebook pages and I encourage all members to take a peek before our next meeting.

8. President’s Cluster Meeting with AG Jan Lawton at Nambour 
Our Cluster Clubs have resolved to commence steps and actions to determine the processes and relevant contacts to best acknowledge the outstanding contributions made by Sir Clem Renouf to the eradication of Polio and the health and wellness of so many people throughout the world in and around the University of the Sunshine Coast with a roadside tree plant, creation of a park and or street renaming.

9. Upcoming Date Claimers 
(a) Elder Abuse Forum
This is scheduled for 10 am for 10.30 am at the Maleny RSL on 1 December. It promises to be a very interesting and informative event and already has over 50 registrations.
(b) RAWCS DIK Container Roster 
I am travelling down with AG Jan Lawton and several Rotarians from other clubs in our cluster to do some work at the Centre at Wacol on 5 Dec. We will be leaving Landsborough no later than 7 am. If any members are interested in joining us for the day, please give me a call.
We are car sharing, so will need to know on Wednesday night so our car arrangements can be finalised
(c) 5 Dec. First Maleny Park Run commencing at 7am sharp at the Beersheba Living  Museum, Parkland Drive off Porters Lane Maleny. Our upcoming guest speaker Jo Turner will discuss the race in greater detail at our next meeting.
(d) 11 Dec Maleny Chamber of Commerce Xmas Concert at Maleny Showgrounds from 5pm. Our Club are running the bar out of the Rotary Food Stall. 
(e) Australia Zoo Car Parking from Boxing Day for about 10 days. Chris B will organise the roster once notified of dates by Glasshouse Club.
(f) Xmas Party 
A booking has been made for the use of the Beersheba Living Museum on 16th December. A great local venue with heaps of space for our enjoyment.
(g) Hinterland Aussie Day Expo
Sadly, the event has been cancelled due to COVID 19.

A small but select group attended despite the attractions of State of Origin 3 and that is was an AGM. President Greg welcomed us and noted the attendance of guest Peter McQuoid before handing the meeting to Jim A to manage the AGM.
The 2019 AGM minutes were accepted and the election of the Board for 2021-2022 was conducted, resulting in the following members being appointed:
President:       Greg Williams
Vice-President:  Michael Gregory
Secretary:       Bernice McLennan
Treasurer:       Jim Atkinson
Directors:       Paulette Steele
                     Craig Sim
                     Angela Griffin / CL Claridge
                     Sherryl Gregory
There was no nominee for President Elect 2022 – 2023
The ‘new’ Board was applauded and there being no further business the AGM was closed.

A short and sharp Sergeant’s session followed. The meeting then heard reports on current and future activities. In brief;
- Lionel talked about the lectern funded by Rotary and made by Blackall Range ‘Woodies’ for the MDSRC.
- Sherryl mentioned the Elder Abuse Forum to be held on December 1st at the RSL. No – it will NOT be another Sergeant’s session! 
- Plans for Australia Day are still under discussion. Cancellation is likely.
- The 1st Park Run is planned for 5th December
- The 2019 World Polio Day video will be shown at the Uniting Church days with a theme of ‘Hope’.
- The Club Xmas party/break-up will be on 16th December at the Beersheba Field with catering by Senor Paella.

The meeting ended early so that members could adjourn to watch the Queensland State of Origin team end a recent drought with a series win.

11th December
Christmas Music Concert at the Showgrounds.  The Club is running the bar at the Rotary Food Stall.

16th December
Christmas Party at Beersheba Living Museum with Senor Paella.

23rd December
No meeting

30th December
No meeting

6th January
Social event to be announced.

6th Chris & Jocelyn  12th Jim & Elaine and Roly and Kerry Neiper 17th Lionel & Judy

11th Jim Atkinson  





Saturday, 14 November 2020

Rotary Club of Maleny Bulletin for 18th November 2020

 "THE RANGE"  Vol. 63 No.10


Maleny Hotel at 6:30 for 7:00pm for the AGM and a Business Meeting.

Apologies please to Bernice before noon on Tuesday.

                         18th Nov       2nd Dec          16th Dec    
Duty Officer     Chris R-S      Sherryl G        James McC  
Assist DO         Jeff C            Roly N            Chris B                   
Registration      Laurelle O    Keith R            Peter McG
Fellowship       John McL      Malcolm B       John W     

12th December
0730 -1030  Rick V   Chris R-S   Brian A  

1030 - 1330  Greg W  TBA   TBA

 16th January

Its been a sad few weeks for our Rotary Club with the passing of Lloyd Larney Past President  1992-1993, Paul Harris Fellow (1989) Caloundra Citizen of the Year 2004 and OAM for Community Service in 2009 and I would like to thank Jim A for his kind words at the opening of our last meeting reflecting on Lloyd’s great contribution to our community in so many areas and for passing on our sincere condolences to wife Shirley and family.

But it was also fantastic to enjoy the company of John Whan returning after the sad loss of Beth. And its great to hear that Malcolm B is recovering well from his recent procedure.

Our Club should be very proud of the work that we are doing within our local community and beyond. Some of the highlights over the past weeks and those approaching are as follows:

Jeff C deserves a huge round of congratulations for organising a very successful End Polio Now Information & Fundraising Dinner at the Maleny RSL enabling the Board to make what we believe is the club’s greatest donation ever to Ending Polio in the sum of $2000. Moreover, as the film that Jeff C selected for viewing on the evening had a focus on “hope”, the Board has further asked Paulette to provide a link to it to the Uniting Church as the clubs contribution to its 2020 Xmas Tree Program. Paulette has now done this, and for anyone interested, it is available for viewing at   World Polio Day Global Update.

Your Board has also moved to increase our RCM’s Kiva Account by $200 following a request from CL who reported that since September, our RCM’s Kiva account received repayments of approximately $250 which has been used to provide 10 new loans as more people are experiencing financial hardship due to Covid-19.

Club members Sherryl G and myself have also continued in conjunction with members from Zonta, Lions, Val France and Dr Barb Smith with the organisation of the upcoming Elder Abuse Forum on Tuesday 1 December 2020 at the Maleny RSL commencing at 10.30 am for 11 am. I encourage as many of our member, partners and their friends to register for attendance. The Elder Abuse Forum will start with a complimentary morning tea, before opening the forum itself at 11am, ending around 12:30pm. As well as physical and emotional abuse, elders often suffer abuse of power by those entrusted with their care. The forum will begin with a 40 minute play (shown as a short movie), which raises issues of elder abuse and the pitfalls in having a Will and Enduring Power of Attorney, as well as how to ensure you retain your rights as you age. The play “Piano Forte” was written by staff at the Suncoast Community Legal Service and has been shown in small theatres within the Sunshine Coast. It is a fun and easily accessible way of introducing these issues for older people. Please RSVP by Monday November 23rd to email: with the following details of all attendees (for COVID records purposes): Name, Street Address, Phone Number, Email Address.

Planning is continuing for our involvement in running the bar at the Maleny Chamber of Commerce Concert Festival at the Maleny Showgrounds on 11th December  as is planning for Aussie Day 2021 on the 26th January.

I ask members to keep an eye out for your rostered dates and times at our Woolworths BBQ. Unfortunately I will be unable to take part this Saturday as previously scheduled as I am accompanying Alan Wilson to display and promote his prototype Market Kart down to Surfers Sunrise Club where we also intend to join them on Saturday at 10 am to celebrate their 10000th Wheelchair in an IR project that has spanned over 25 years.

Phillip S and our Membership and Website committee have also made some tough decisions over the past few days and we can look forward to some great news on changes to our website and its ongoing maintenance.

Can members also please keep the evening of 16 December free for our upcoming Xmas function to be held at the Beersheba Living Museum and catered by Robert from Senor Paella. Details will be provided at our next meeting.

Lionel T has also been instrumental in organising the construction and delivery of a magnificent timber lectern to MDSRC following a conversation with current MDSRC President Mike Norman who inquired as to the possibility of having one supplied by the Montville Woodies.  Lionel took up the gauntlet with his twin hats as a Rotarian and Woodie and mentioned Mikes request at the next Woodies meeting a few days later. One of the Woodies at the meeting, Ron Turner, a former manual arts teacher at Maleny State High School and retiree living on the Range had no hesitation, and  immediately offered to design and build a  timber lectern for MDSRC for use during presentations at the clubhouse and Beersheba Living Museum. Lionel also approached the Maleny Rotary Club to contribute up to $250 towards the purchase of some stainless steel rods and other bits and pieces to be utilised in the design which also met with unanimous support from the Rotary Board. The lectern was delivered about 10 days ago to MDSRC and has met with glowing admiration by members commenting on its modern flowing functional design, made from local timbers comprising red cedar on the vertical column and top place stand and tallowood frame reflecting Ron's masterful timberwork style.  The lectern was originally about 3 inches higher and Lionel felt it may have been a bit tall for some height challenged speakers so he made some minor adjustments by lowering it by 3 inches and enabling  it to be raised and lowered to suit. Bernice McLennan has also provided Lionel with a small metal Rotary badge which has now been affixed to the front of the lectern. A photo opportunity for those involved in this project is being organised.

It is also a pleasure to report that our Club was well represented at the Rotary Foundation Seminar held at Lawnton last Sunday by Bernice M, Angela G, Sherry G, Craig S, Alan W and myself at what was the last Foundation Seminar for our current Rotary District 9600 prior to our formal amalgamation next year into District 9620. Interestingly, the amalgamation will be occurring by amendments passed at the meeting to the 9620 corporate structure as it is already registered in all of the Pacific Island Nations and PNG and would take up to 3 years to do again. The District Office has been sold for $390,000 plus GST, and on completion, the proceeds will be retained to ensure that one years administrative costs are held in reserve to meet the constitution’s requirements.

As President, I shall also be attending our Hinterland Cluster Meeting on 21 November at 9am at 16 Canmaroo Ave Nambour.

In the meantime, Go the Maroons, and hope to see you at the Maleny Hotel this Wednesday evening.

President Greg opened the meeting by welcoming members, guest Peter McQuoit, Guest Speaker Clive Waring and his wife Elizabeth. He mentioned the recent sad death of PP Lloyd Larney OAM.  Jim A attended the funeral and updated the Club on Lloyd's record of service, not only to our Club but to many organiasations in the town.

- Sherryl spoke about Wellness and Elder Abuse; there will be a training session conducted by experts in the field. People attending will report back to their relative clubs re the training received. Three Rotarians will be present. Blue signs have been posted around town.

- Chris/Sherryl have spoken to the River School about the Rotary Solar Light Project which will start February 2021. Looking for Rotarians to assist.

- Jeff C was congratulated for organising a very successful Polio Dinner last week. 48 participants were in attendance with $780 being raised for polio. Members from 5 different Rotary Clubs were in attendance.

- Rotary Foundation Seminar to be held on 8th November at Lions Hall, Gympie Rd, Lawton. Five members will be attending.

- Paulette spoke about the Chamber of Commerce Music Concert at the showgrounds scheduled for 11th December. She has received a Council grant but requires approval from the relevant authorities.

- Jim reported that a grant was received by Rotary and Lions for a new speaker system for the Showgrounds.

- Lionel reported that a quotation for playground equipment for Settlers Green had been received. Installation will have to be piece by piece as funding is obtained.

Guest Speaker Clive Waring reviewed his training and career in the photographic business.  He had virtually retired in Maleny whilst still photographing weddings as Solvershotz.  On 24th March when the PM announced weddings were limited to 5 people, Silvershotz received an immediate cancellation or postponement of 6 months of wedding & event bookings!! 

Having spent six months in isolation, Clive found that there is only so much gardening one can do. Having recently helped an aged aunt move out of her house into a retirement home, Clive inherited boxes of family photos. Fortunately a lot of elderly relatives were able to identify the people were in the photos, where they were born and even the dates they were born and died. He very quickly had a pictorial history dating back to 1900 with all the notations making this a valuable family story. He scanned all the photos from 1900 to 2006, imported digital photos from 2006 to 2020 so that he was able to create a timeline of 120 years with 100 photos. The photos were carefully positioned on his studio computer templates, with text typed next to each photo telling the story. These were printed onto commercial photographic paper, adhered onto acid free board and then book bound using genuine leather for the cover. The result is a legacy heirloom album for the future generations to enjoy.  

Clive believes that society is in danger of losing its family pictorial heritage. He has observed first hand families clearing the homes of deceased relatives and ending up with boxes of loose photos. They may pick out one or two (if they know who they are) and put them in a small frame. The tragedy is that the rest remain in a box in a dark cupboard, until a family member decides to put them in the recycling bin - family history lost forever which is so sad.  His project aims to bring families closer together before it is too late. Now is the time for baby boomers to collate family photos from all their elderly relatives, their own albums and their children. Turn it into a project that brings all the generations together. Using one of the many conference/meeting apps families can meet from all around the world. Young children can ask questions about relatives, living and deceased, then make notes about each person in the

Alan Wilson gave the vote of thanks.

Meeting closed at 8.20pm so we could all go home and watch QLD thrash NSW in the State of Origin. However Blues supporters are smiling as I write.

2nd December
Maleny Hotel at 6:30 for 7:00pm with Guest Speaker Joanne Turner on Park Run.

16th December
Christmas Party at Beersheba Living Museum with Senor Paella.

12th Ric and Jacinta 19th Michael and Sherryl

2nd Sherryl Gregory  4th Elaine Atkinson  11th Ric Townsend  25th Bill Hankinson  29th Brian Allen


An elderly Italian man living alone in New Jersey wanted to plant his annual tomato garden, but it was very difficult work, since the ground was hard. His only son, Vincent, who used to help him, was in prison. The old man wrote a letter to his son and described his predicament.

Dear Vincent,
I am feeling pretty sad, because it looks like I won’t be able to plant my tomato garden this year. I’m just getting too old to be digging up a garden plot. I know if you were here my troubles would be over.. I know you would be happy to dig the plot for me, like in the old days.

A few days later he received a letter from his son.

Dear Pop,
Don’t dig up that garden. That’s where the bodies are buried.

At 4 a.m. the next morning, FBI agents and local police arrived and dug up the entire area without finding any bodies. They apologized to the old man and left. That same day the old man received another letter from his son.

Dear Pop,
Go ahead and plant the tomatoes now. That’s the best I could do under the circumstances.
Love you,

Saturday, 31 October 2020

Rotary Club of Maleny Bulletin for 4th November 2020

"THE RANGE"  Vol. 63 No.9



Sadly Lloyd passed away recently at the age of 90 and his funeral was held at the Uniting Church on 30th October.

Lloyd returned to Maleny in 1969 after serving with the RAAF. He joined the Club in 1970 and was President in 1992.  He remained a very active member until ill health intervened in recent years. In 2004 he was named the Caloundra Citizen of the Year and in 2009 was awarded the OAM for Community Service.  In addition to Rotary he was involved as a volunteer in numerous Maleny organisations. On behalf of all members, our sincerest condolences to Shirley and his family at this sad time. 

Maleny Hotel at 6:30 for 7:00pm with Guest Speaker Clive Waring on Heritage Photos.

Apologies please to Jim A before noon on Tuesday.

                        4th Nov    18th Nov       2nd Dec    
Duty Officer     Fran T      Chris R-S       Sherryl G  
Assist DO        Alan W      Jeff C            Roly N                   
Registration     Lionel T     Laurelle O    Keith R
Fellowship       Bill H        John McL      Malcolm B     

14th November
0730 - 1030  Jim A   Bernice McL   Greg W
1030 - 1330  Brian A   Roly N   Rick V

12th December
0730 -1030  Rick V   Chris R-S   Brian A  
1030 - 1330  Greg W  TBA   TBA

 16th January


Train Ride for Polio with PDG Eric Woods, ADG Jan Lawton, President Greg and PP Jeff Cornfoot.

ADG Jan presents Bob and Sue Hall Paul Harris Fellowships at the Rotary Polio Dinner.

Bruce McNaught, coordinator D9600 PolioPlus & guest speaker at the Polio Dinner in the RSL Hall organised by Jeff Cornfoot.


President Greg welcomed 19 members and two guests of the Club to the regular Dinner meeting held at the Maleny Hotel. The Club guests were Mark & Margaret Henderson, who have recently purchased the Maleny Ray White Real Estate agency. The theme of the night was “Lift the Lid for Mental Health”, with many members wearing a range of unusual hats to bring attention to the research undertaken by Australian Rotary Health.

As this meeting was a designated Business meeting, President Greg, Directors and members reported on current and upcoming activities of the Club. The main topics raised were:

• Ric T advised that the bench seat outside the Maleny Post Office had been refurbished by Malcolm Baker, painted red, which the Club paid for, and reinstalled. 

• Greg advised that he, Chris Brooker, John & Bernice McLennan and Paulette Steele had attended the 100yr celebration of the opening of the Maleny Soldiers Memorial Hospital on Wednesday October 21st. The Maleny Hospital is one of only two Soldiers Memorial Hospitals in Queensland, the other being St Andrews in Brisbane.

• Jeff C reported on the Polio Plus fundraising dinner to be held at the Maleny RSL on Wednesday October 28th. To date 47 people have indicated that they will be attending. Jeff encouraged all to attend and to bring guests, as $10 from each attendee would be donated to Polio Plus.

• Paulette S advised the meeting that the Organising Committee for the Christmas Music Festival had been successful in obtaining a grant from the Sunshine Coast Council, and as a result the event would go ahead on Friday 11th December from 6pm. Rotary would be running a Bar on the night with other local Clubs running various food stalls.

• Phillip S reported that the Club had been successful in obtain a grant from the Sunshine Coast Council to upgrade the Club’s website. As the grant was only 50% 0f what was sought, Phillip would meet with his committee and see what, if anything, they could use the funds for.

• Lionel T informed the meeting that the Lectern for M.D.S.R.C, that the Club had agreed to finance, had been completed by a member of “The Blackall Range Woodcrafters Guild”.

• Jim A reported that the Club’s first Sausage Sizzle at Woolworth’s had raised $229 for the Club, with a further $85 being raised with Calendar sales. A great effort by everyone involved.

The highlight of the night was the unveiling of Alan Wilson’s invention the “ROTARY MARKET KART”. The Kart made mainly from recycled bike parts as well as a recycled shopping trolley donated by IGA, is designed to be used in the Pacific Islands by the local people to carry goods to and from the markets. At present usually the women carry goods to and from markets on their heads or in a traditional Billum bag. Alan’s invention could also be used as a market stall. He and Chris B will take the Kart to show the members of the Surfer’s Sunrise RC to see if they would be interested in producing the Kart along with their current project of making Wheelchairs for Pacific Islanders.

7th November 
Calendar sales at Community Centre Kiosk
DIK container loading

8th November
Rotary Foundation Seminar at St Columban's

11th November
Board Meeting

18th November
Maleny Hotel at 6:30 for 7:00pm for AGM.

2nd December
Maleny Hotel at 6:30 for 7:00pm with Guest Speaker Joanne Turner on Park Run.

12th Ric and Jacinta  19th Michael and Sherryl

2nd Sherryl Gregory  4th Elaine Atkinson  11th Ric Townsend  25th Bill Hankinson  29th Brian Allen



There may be some members who have had a surfeit of press coverage.  Hopefully this will provoke a wry smile.


Saturday, 17 October 2020

 "THE RANGE"  Vol. 62 No.8


Maleny Hotel at 6:30 for 7:00pm for a Business Meeting.

Apologies please to Bernice before noon on Tuesday.

                        21st Oct          4th Nov       18th Nov                
Duty Officer    Bernice McL    Fran T         Chris R-S         
Assist DO       Jim A               Alan W        Jeff C                   
Registration    Phillip S          Lionel T        Laurelle O
Fellowship      James McC     Bill H          John McL           

14th November
0730 - 1030  Jim A  Bernice McL  Greg W

1030 - 1330  Brian A  Roly N  Rick V

12th December

We had a couple of guests at our dinner meeting. Ric T introduced Val France for a second time to our meeting and Jeff C introduced Peter McQuoit who is new to Maleny from Samford. I believe Jeff mentioned that Peter was a volunteer at our Blues Drive-In concert in July.
Val F gave a short account about the group Speak Up Now to combat Domestic Violence and the newly restored Red Bench, outside the post office, which is a collaboration of various groups and the Red Rose Foundation. Most of the work on the bench was done by our tireless Malcolm Baker. There will be the official unveiling of the Red Bench on Friday morning 9th October with Councillor Winston Johnston and Val told us there will be more red benches popping up in Maleny.
Lionel T spoke about the Settlers Green on the Maleny Precinct giving us an update on the trials and tribulations of the installation of Children’s Playground equipment. He also did a plug for the 2021 calendars.
Bernice mentioned about the upcoming Mental Health Day on the 21st October, the same date as our next dinner at the hotel. Everyone is to come wearing a hat, of any description.
Jeff C promoted the End Polio dinner he is organizing at the RSL on 28th October.
Paulette spoke about the vocational night and how everyone seemed to particularly enjoy the wine tasting and pizzas at Finbars/Jen’s Pizza.
The conference on Sunday 8th November which this year will be held in Lawnton was mentioned as we need a minimum of two people from the club to attend, so that we are eligible for apply for district and global grants.
Craig S mentioned Movember and so far, he and Greg W are taking part in this. Greg has already started to grow his moustache for next month, however it wasn’t that noticeable yet.
Paulette also talked about the Maleny Commerce organized Christmas Festival this year being held instead at the showgrounds as a Christmas Music Concert and that the service clubs only will be providing food and Chris B has nominated Rotary to run the bar instead of food as it’s easier and more profitable. Whether this proceeds will depend on the grant that Maleny Commerce has applied for.
Bernice gave us a bit of an update about the Christmas Tree Festival and what is happening instead. She had lost her email about the event however recalled that this year to have a Covid safe event, it had been decided to have videos instead of trees. The theme is HOPE.
Jim A updated us on the Sausage Sizzles and how we have been invited to be included in the roster for the Woolies’ ones. Rotary will replace the Historical Society who have been doing it up to now. It was a unanimous decision to join in these as they are far more profitable than those previously held in Maple Street. So, Saturday 17th October will be our first one and it was decided to have two teams, three
people doing the 7.30 to 10.30am shift and a further three doing the 10.30am to 1.30pm shift.
Chris B conducted the sergeant’s fines in his usual style bringing loads of laughter to the evening.

The highlight of the evening was to see Keith Rogers being awarded a Paul Harris fellowship. As you are reading this, Keith is the person who, with undisputed regularity, puts together this blog every fortnight for all of us to read.

Wayne Litherland from ROMAC (Rotary Oceania Medical Aid for Children) was our guest and speaker for the evening. Since 1988, over 500 children have been assisted in hospitals in Australia and NZ. They now help up to 40-50 children per year from Timor Leste, PNG, Solomon Islands, Fiji and Tonga.
Wayne showed us a video which gave a good coverage of what valuable work ROMAC does. Wayne then related a couple of stories that particularly touched him of children he had encountered and the difference that ROMAC had made to their lives. 
One was the story of Vincent who had not just his first aircraft flight but also his first ride in a car and the puffer jacket they had given him as he was so underdressed for a cold climate which he had never experienced. Later back home on the island, Wayne saw Vincent proudly still wearing his puffer jacket as he played, even though he must have been cooking in it. ROMAC has turned life around for many children over the 32 years.

Paulette gave the vote of thanks.

23rd October
Train Ride for Polio Day.

28th October
Polio Fund Raising Dinner at the RSL.

4th November
Maleny Hotel at 6:30 for 7:00pm with Guest Speaker Clive Waring on Heritage Photos.

8th November
Rotary Foundation Seminar at St Columban's.

11th November
Board Meeting

18th November
Maleny Hotel at 6:30 for 7:00pm for AGM.

26th Rick and Cilla

12th Gloria Rogers  14th Keith Rogers  16th Kerry Neiper  28th Bernice McLennan  30th Andy Schouteten  31st Gillian Allen


This is the first time I have heard about Paraprosdokians. Paraprosdokians are figures of speech in which the latter part of a sentence or phrase is surprising or unexpected and is frequently humorous. Groucho Marx used the form frequently.

1. Where there's a will, I want to be in it.

 2. The last thing I want to do is hurt you ... but it's still on my list.

 3. Since light travels faster than sound, some people appear bright until you hear them speak.

 4. If I agreed with you, we'd both be wrong.

 5. We never really grow up -- we only learn how to act in public.

 6. War does not determine who is right, only who is left.

 7. Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit. Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.

 8. To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism. To steal from many is research.

9. I didn't say it was your fault, I said I was blaming you.

10. In filling out an application, where it says, "In case of emergency, notify... " I answered " a doctor."

 11. Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are sexy.

12. You do not need a parachute to skydive. You only need a parachute to skydive twice.

13. I used to be indecisive, but now I’m not so sure.

14. To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first and call whatever you hit the target.

Thursday, 1 October 2020

Rotary Club of Maleny Bulletin for 7th October 2020

 "THE RANGE"  Vol. 62 No.7


Maleny Hotel at 6:30 for 7:00pm for Guest Speaker for Wayne Litherland on ROMAC.

Apologies please to Bernice before noon on Tuesday.

                       7th Oct         21st Oct             4th Nov              
Duty Officer   Ric T            Bernice McL       TBA        
Assist DO      Paulette S    Jim A                    
Registration   Michael G    Phillip S
Fellowship     Roly N        James McC
None at present

I thank all our members who have assisted with the parking of cars over the school  holidays at Australia Zoo. Their voluntary service has helped to keep visitors to Australia Zoo safe, provided an opportunity to meet and catch up with members from our sister clubs at Glasshouse, Woombye-Palmwoods and Nambour whilst also  raising some funds for our club.

Another thank you to Roly and Phillip for conducting an excellent brainstorming session to work out one or more 100 year projects for the club. Please could members continue to expand and/or develop ideas and provide them to Roly and  Phillip. 

 And last Wednesday Paulette organised a fantastic vocational visit to Forest Heart Nursery at Coral Street where we were treated to an informative presentation from Spencer Shaw, followed by a very interesting wine tasting at Purple Palate and a scrumptious wood fired pizza from Jen.

 Lastly could you keep your diaries free firstly to join with me for an early morning Ride for Polio train trip on Friday 23 October from Nambour to Landsborough and also to attend our Polio Dinner being organised by Jeff at the Maleny RSL on Wed 28 Oct 2020.

President Greg welcomed partners and guest Craig Sim to the club business meeting. Greg thanked members who had volunteered for the Ironman Event on 13 September at Maroochydore. Sherryl called for helpers to distribute the Domestic and Family Violence signs for Men’s Amenities. Jeff gave information about the Polio Fundraiser Night at the RSL on Wednesday 28 October, as well as calendar selling at the Community Centre kiosk on Wednesday 30 September and Saturday 7 November. Chris B. advised that the Australia Zoo Parking duty roster had been emailed out to members participating throughout the school holidays (19 Sept- 04 Oct).

Paulette outlined the arrangements for the club Vocational Visit on Wednesday 30 September. It will begin at the Forest Heart Eco-nursery in Coral Street at 4.30pm for a look around and educational talk, then move to the Purple Palate at 6pm for a wine tasting of wines from the Mudgee/Orange area of NSW, interspersed with wood-fired Pizza from Jen’s Pizzas. Cost will be $20 for wine tasting and $10 for pizza. Paulette also advised that the Christmas Carnival on Friday 11 December will be in a different format this year. It will be a Music Concert at the Showgrounds, with opportunity for local service clubs to sell food at the event.

Bernice advised that the Uniting Church Christmas Tree Festival will be going ahead but also take a different format this year. The theme will be “Hope” - appropriate for 2020. Rick V explained that the Australia Day Community Expo and Citizenship Ceremony for 2021 was in doubt, due to COVID restrictions. The Sea Cadets are unable to take part in any public events at this stage.

Jim responded to many members enquiries about Beth Whan’s funeral which was held at Caloundra on Tuesday 8 September. Due to COVID restrictions it was invitation only, however the service can be viewed online at the Gregson and Weight website. Jim also advised that the Maleny Quilter’s Group had donated $784.10 to the Rotary Bushfire Appeal which was established earlier in the year. Jim has deposited the funds into the RAWCS Bushfire Appeal account. Sergeant Chris then conducted a short sharp Sergeant’s session.

The highlight of the meeting was the induction of Craig Sim into membership of the club, and the world wide family of Rotary. Craig, who owns a communications business in the main street, and is a former member of Apex, will hold the classification of Communications. Rick V will be his Rotary mentor. He was enthusiastically welcomed into the club by members.

The remainder of the meeting was taken up by a structured brainstorming session conducted by the Membership Committee. The focus of the session was how the club could celebrate 100 years of Rotary in Australia.  Ideas that would foster membership growth and increased awareness of Rotary ‘s work and world-wide achievements were encouraged. Roly ably chaired the session while Phillip projected the ideas put forward onto the screen. Many suggestions were recorded, showing a variety of ideas for both long and short-term projects and events. These will be prioritised by the Membership Committee for further consideration.

Finally, Lionel reminded members that the 2021 calendars were now on sale at $5 and would be available at meetings for purchase. All submitted photo entries are up for viewing in Maple 3. Michael encouraged members to tune into the Rotary Zone Conference from Alice Springs being held over the following weekend. Speakers from all over the world will be featured. Greg thanked all members and guests for their participation and attendance before closing the meeting.

14th October
Board Meeting

21st October
Maleny Hotel at 6:30 for 7:00pm for Business Meeting.

23rd October
Train Ride for Polio Day.

28th October
Polio Fund Raising Dinner at the RSL.

26th Rick and Cilla

12th Gloria Rogers  14th Keith Rogers  16th Kerry Neiper  28th Bernice McLennan  30th Andy Schouteten  31st Gillian Allen


Many years ago, Al Capone virtually owned Chicago.  Capone wasn't famous for anything heroic.  He was notorious for enmeshing the windy city in everything from bootlegged booze and prostitution to murder.  Capone had a lawyer nicknamed "Easy Eddie."  He was Capone's lawyer for a good reason.  Eddie was very good!  In fact, Eddie's skill at legal manoeuvring kept Big Al out of jail for a long time.
To show his appreciation, Capone paid him very well. Not only was the money big, but Eddie got special dividends, as well.  For instance, he and his family occupied a fenced-in mansion with live-in help and all of the conveniences of the day. The estate was so large that it filled an entire Chicago City block.
Eddie lived the high life of the Chicago mob and gave little consideration to the atrocity that went on around him. Eddie did have one soft spot, however.  He had a son that he loved dearly.  Eddie saw to it that his young son had clothes, cars, and a good education.  Nothing was withheld.   Price was no object.
And, despite his involvement with organized crime, Eddie even tried to teach him right from wrong.  Eddie wanted his son to be a better man than he was.  Yet, with all his wealth and influence, there were two things he couldn't give his son; he couldn't pass on a good name or a good example.
One day, Easy Eddie reached a difficult decision.  Easy Eddie wanted to rectify wrongs he had done.  He decided he would go to the authorities and tell the truth about Al "Scarface" Capone, clean up his tarnished name and offer his son some resemblance of integrity.  To do this, he would have to testify against The Mob, and he knew that the cost would be great. However he testified.
Within the year, Easy Eddie's life ended in a blaze of gunfire on a lonely Chicago Street.  But in his eyes, he had given his son the greatest gift he had to offer, at the greatest price he could ever pay.  Police removed from his pockets a rosary, a crucifix, a religious medallion, and a poem clipped from a magazine.
The poem read:
 "The clock of life is wound but once, and no man has the power to tell just when the hands will stop, at late or early hour.  Now is the only time you own.  Live, love, toil with a will.  Place no faith in time.  For the clock may soon be still."
World War II produced many heroes. One such man was Lieutenant Commander Butch O'Hare. He was a fighter pilot assigned to the aircraft carrier Lexington in the South Pacific. One day his entire squadron was sent on a mission.  After he was airborne, he looked at his fuel gauge and realized that someone had forgotten to top off his fuel tank.  He would not have enough fuel to complete his mission and get back to his ship.

His flight leader told him to return to the carrier.  Reluctantly, he dropped out of formation and headed back to the fleet. As he was returning to the mother ship, he saw something that turned his blood cold; a squadron of Japanese aircraft was speeding its way toward the American fleet. The American fighters had flown on a sortie, and the fleet was all but defenseless.  He couldn't reach his squadron and bring them back in time to save the fleet.  Nor could he warn the fleet of the approaching danger. There was only one thing to do.  He must somehow divert them from the fleet.
Laying aside all thoughts of personal safety, he dived into the formation of Japanese planes.  Wing-mounted 50 caliber's blazed as he charged in, attacking one surprised enemy plane and then another.  Butch wove in and out of the now broken formation and fired at as many planes as possible until all his ammunition was finally spent. Undaunted, he continued the assault.  He dived at the planes, trying to clip a wing or tail in hopes of damaging as many enemy planes as possible, rendering them unfit to fly.
Finally, the exasperated Japanese squadron took off in another direction. Deeply relieved, Butch O'Hare and his tattered fighter limped back to the carrier. Upon arrival, he reported in and related the event surrounding his return. The film from the gun-camera mounted on his plane told the tale.  It showed the extent of Butch's daring attempt to protect his fleet  He had, in fact, destroyed five enemy aircraft.  This took place on February 20, 1942, and for that action Butch became the Navy's first Ace of W.W.II, and the first Naval Aviator to win the Medal of Honor.
A year later Butch was killed in aerial combat at the age of 29.  His home town would not allow the memory of this WW II hero to fade, and today, O'Hare airport in Chicago is named in tribute to the courage of this great man. So, the next time you find yourself at O'Hare International, give some thought to visiting Butch's memorial displaying his statue and his Medal of Honor.  It's located between Terminals 1 and 2.


Butch O'Hare was "Easy Eddie's" son.

Thursday, 10 September 2020

Rotary Club of Maleny Bulletin for 16th September 2020

 "THE RANGE"  Vol. 62 No.6



A moving ceremony to commemorate the life of Beth Whan was held on 8th September at Gregson & Weight Caloundra. 

Beth had been an integral part of our Club since 1980 when she and John moved to Maleny. She was ever present at Club functions for 40 years and will be sorely missed.

On behalf of all members, our sincerest condolences to John and his family at this sad time.


Maleny Hotel at 6:30 for 7:00pm for Business Meeting.


Apologies please to Bernice before noon on Tuesday.

                       16th Sep            7th Oct           21st Oct               
Duty Officer    Malcolm B         Ric T               Bernice McL                          
Assist DO        Sherryl G          Paulette S      Jim A                   
Registration     Bill H                Michael G       Phillip S
Fellowship       Peter  McG       Roly N            James McC

None at present.

1. It has been a sad start to spring for long term member John Whan with the passing of his beloved wife Beth. Our sincere condolences are with John and his family.

2. Qld COVID-19 Regulations
I want to congratulate members for their social distancing and safe hygiene practices over the past few months and ask that we all remain vigilant in our compliance with these regulations as we move into the last quarter of the calendar year.

3. Domestic and Family Violence collaboration with Zonta, Quota, and Lions Clubs
(a) Auspicing Agreement and MOU 
I am finalising an MOU between the collaborating partners and an Auspice agreement for the funds paid to our club for this on-going project.
(b) Refurbishment of the Red Rose Foundation Bench Seat outside the Maleny Post Office
Post office red paint has been purchased by the club for the refurbishment of the seat and as soon as we have the okay from the Body Corporate of the Riverside Centre , Malcolm B and Ric T (as members of Maleny Mens Shed) will remove the seat, refurbish it and replace it into the same spot.
(c) Domestic and Family Violence Forum
It was a privilege to be involved in the Forum on the 26 Aug at the Maleny RSL which presented a wealth of valuable information to our community through 4 excellent informative and highly experienced speakers. A member of the audience Sr Sgt Detective Daren Edwards from the Maroochydore CIB mentioned during a question from the audience that one of the most difficult problems facing our Society is the need to change our culture and attitudes to domestic and family violence which starts in the family through parents who are teaching /modelling behaviour and attitudes to their children.
(d) Speak Up Now Stop Domestic and Family Violence new logo and letterhead 
The collaborating Partners have also designed a new logo and letterhead 
(e) D&FV signage 
The distribution and fixing of the new blue signage for male toilets throughout Maleny and Witta will be organised by Sherryl G at our next meeting.

4. Pride of Workmanship Awards
Our Vocation Services Director Paulette S and her team together with fantastic contributions on the night from Ric T, Sherry G, and Alan W have held a magnificent Pride of Workmanship Dinner at Tranquil Park on Saturday 29 August 2020. Paulette has also had a great article printed in the MDSRC newsletter with others planned for the GC&MN, SVG and HT. Arrangements are being made to present the remaining award to Melodi Fanti from the IGA during one of our October meetings. As Paulette S has suggested, we should definitely hold the event next year to coincide again with National Skills Week (24th – 30th August 2020 this year).

5. Maleny Settlers Green Project
The Club was also mentioned in the MDSRC Newsletter this week regarding the $35000 funding for the playground equipment. Selection of the equipment is now underway.

6. Nepal - Business Entrepreneurship Training & Support for Women with Disability
Covid 19 and government restrictions including two lockdown periods in Kathmandu Valley have delayed the commencement of this project. Pahichan and Shed the Light Nepal staff decided to implement one component of the project through a virtual workshop. This workshop will be held over three days 12-14 September. The facilitators are blind Nepali women, two of whom live overseas in Denmark and USA where they work as business counsellors to better the position of vision impaired women in those countries. The third resides and works in Nepal.
The aim of the workshop is to enhance the communication and interpersonal skills of women with disabilities and to open new and a wide spectrum of opportunities for business enterprises.
The facilitators will share ideas from abroad and work with the women to find ways to develop effective marketing strategies in the Nepali context. The third day will also be attended by business representatives, NGO/INGO members, stakeholders, government etc. This session will focus on advocacy and networking.
The Rotary Club of New City Road in Kathmandu is supporting the project by contributing supplies to the training program.

7. Kiva 
To date, RCM has provided 125 loans totalling $3250 to people in 29 countries. Loans have been in 12 different sectors, mostly in health, retail, agriculture, education and housing.

8. Maleny Education Support Fund
Since July, the MESF has received and approved five applications for support. Government restrictions under the Covid-19 pandemic have, and are continuing to have financial impacts for families in our area. Business downturn, job loss and family fragmentation are appearing as difficulty for families with children of school age. It is anticipated the number of applications for support from MESF will increase in the next 12 months. 
The Board has just approved another donation of $2500 into the project.

9. Induction of Craig Sim
I am looking forward to the induction of Craig at our next meeting on Wed 16 Sep 2000. I know that Craig will be an outstanding Rotarian, and enthusiastic member of our club, and hope members partners are also able to join with us in celebrating his membership to our club.

10. Upcoming Date Claimers 
(a) Wed 30 Sep 2012 Vocation Visit Wine Tasting and Dinner. Paulette S has organised a vocational visit to Forest Heart Eco Nursery at 4.30pm. Spencer Shaw will take us through what’s happening in gardens in Spring. Paulette expects it to last about 60- 75 mins depending on questions. After that, Paulette has booked us in for a wine tasting at the Purple Palate at 6.00pm. (2 whites and 2 reds) The approximate price for the wine tasting is $20per head and will be confirmed once we get numbers. It will start at 6.00pm and go through to approx. 7.30pm and will be held in Finbars. Wines tasted will also be available to purchase at around the $20 price point per bottle. Then Paulette has booked us in with Jen at Jen’s Pizza, which is linked to Finbars, and she is happy to organize us some pizzas to intersperse with our wine tasting at an approximate price of  $10 per head. 
(b) Ironman 70.3 event Sunshine Coast 13 Sep 2020 –Wishing our members who have volunteered an enjoyable experience at the event.
(c) Australia Zoo Car Parking 19 Sep – 4 Oct 2020 Chris B has organised the roster.
(d) Calendar distribution & Sales at Maleny Kiosk Wed 30 Sep 2020. Jeff C has forwarded around to members a roster and will finalise this if possible at our next meeting. 
(e) RAWCS DIK Container Roster Sat 10 Oct 2020. The Board has decided not to participate in the roster due to the nearby hotspots.
(f) Polio Train Fri 23 October 2020  A Joint local Rotary Club Cluster activity has been planned by AG Jan Lawton and I shall speak further to this at coming meetings.
(g) Polio Dinner at Maleny RSL Wed 28 Oct 2020 . Jeff C is organising a Polio Dinner and Information evening at the Maleny RSL to promote and raise funds for Polio Plus and will speak more to this at our next meeting.
(h) Foundation Seminar 08/11/2020 . A new venue is being located for this Rotary Event.

11. 100 Year Rotary project(s) A special session will be hosted by Roly N and Phillip S at our next meeting to identify one or more projects for the club to undertake.


President Greg opened the meeting by welcoming 20 members plus guests Craig Sims, Val France of Quota, Guest Speaker PP Greg Isons and his wife Ann.

PP Sherryl spoke of the successful Domestic Violence forum for organisations on the Range.  Signs to be put around Maleny-SPEAK OUT NOW.

On behalf of Quota, Val presented a cheque for $1,000 as feed money for the "Speak Up Now" campaign which was received with applause.

P Greg then said:
- that the Club was liaising with the Mens' Shed to refurbish the seat outside the Post Office.
- that the Pride of Workmanship Dinner had been a great event for the Club.  He congratulated Paulette for organising the event and thanked the four speakers who addresses the theme "Do it once and do it well".
- that volunteers for the Maroochydore Iron Man event must register on line.
- that the Vocational Visit to the Eco Nursery on 30 September was scheduled for one hour at 4:30pm.  It would be followed by a wine tasting and pizza in Finbars.

Lionel T thanked those who assisted hanging the calendar photographs in Maple 3 and announced that the Kiosk had been booked for sales on 30 September.

The Sergeant made his anticipated assault on the truth - and members wallets.

Chris B introduced PP Greg Isons of Rotary Club of Eumundi to talk about their Project Dogura for Womens Health in PNG. Greg had been brought up in India prior to working for 13 years in PNG. He then served 25 years in the Australian Air Force.

The Eumundi Club started making small donations to PNG before deciding to look at Milne Bay Province for project support. It is one of the poorest areas in PNG   They developed a relationship with Dogura Mission which services the remote areas of Milne Bay. The mortality rate of women during childbirth is 80 times that of Australia and 40 of 1,000 new born babies die.  In Dogura the hospital conditions are spartan.

The Club is committed to an initial project of $7,000 for which it has received a District Grant. It is seeking support from other D9600 clubs. The scope of the project includes some refurbishment of the maternity ward, internal toilet and shower facilities and a sewer connection. This is the first step in Project Dogura which has the following goal:

PP Greg would welcome the involvement of other clubs in the future.  Alan Wilson proposed the vote of thanks.

The meeting concluded at 2030h.


Acknowledging and recognizing people taking pride in their work is something that’s rarely done. It’s not about winning prizes, it’s purely about taking the time to show appreciation for a job well done.

On Saturday 29th August, the Rotary Club of Maleny did this at a presentation dinner at Tranquil Park and gave several nominated people a ‘Pride of Workmanship’ award plaque in recognition of going above and beyond in their everyday work.

6 people were nominated and regrettably one nominee, Melody Fanti, bakery manager at Super IGA Maleny, was unable to attend due to an IGA work function on the same evening. Rotary club will do a separate presentation to Melody.

The other 5 nominees did attend, together with their respective nominators, the people that took the time to write some words about why they deserved to be recognized for this award.

It was smiles all around and even a couple of tears of joy when each nominee was presented with their award and the person who nominated them spoke about why they deserved to receive this recognition.

It was also wonderful to see such a cross section of people from various walks of life. There were:

Clive Powell – Volunteer groundsman, gardener, painter, joint curator and more at Pioneer Village

Debbie Rossow – Learning Support Facilitator at the Maleny Independent School

Gayle Pope – Library Officer at Maleny Library

Neal Charlton – Electrician & Sole Trader at Traditional Maintenance

Sherri Dan – Food & Beverage Services at Hotel Maleny

The nominees brought their partners and friends along to enjoy the night with them. It was interesting to see some lingering and chatting with each other long after the official part of the evening finished.

A big thanks to Alan Wilson, a past president in the Maleny Rotary Club, who pushed late last year to have this event held again after a gap of 8-9 years. Little did we know then what 2020 held for us and so it seems even more timely that this event was held. Next year, it’ll be on again, so start thinking about who you would like to see recognized to receive a ‘Pride of Workmanship’ award.

16th September  Maleny Hotel at 6:30 for 7:00pm for Business Meeting.

23rd September   No meeting.

30th September  Vocational visit to Eco Nursery at 4:30pm.

3rd October  DIK container loading - cancelled.

7th October  Maleny Hotel at 6:30 for 7:00pm for Wayne Litherland on ROMAC.

14th October Board Meeting.

4th John & Bernice McLennan  18th Andy & Mia Schouteten  28th Keith & Gloria Rogers

17th Judi Ross-Smith 29th Mia Schouteten


If you're not familiar with the work of Steven Wright, he's the famous erudite (comic) scientist who once said:  "I woke up one morning, and all of my stuff had been stolen and replaced by exact duplicates." His mind sees things differently than most of us do. . . here are some of his gems:

- I'd kill for a Nobel Peace Prize.

 - Borrow money from pessimists - they don't expect it back.

- Half the people you know are below average.

 - A conscience is what hurts when all your other parts feel so good.

 - A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.

- The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.

 - How do you tell when you're out of invisible ink?

 - When everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.

 - Ambition is a poor excuse for not having enough sense to be lazy.

 - I intend to live forever... So far, so good.

 - What happens if you get scared half to death twice?

 - If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.

- To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research.

- The problem with the gene pool is that there is no lifeguard.

- Everyone has a photographic memory; some just don't have film. 

- If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.