Saturday 6 August 2011

Vol 53 No 6 Bulletin for 10 August 2011

"THE RANGE" The Rotary Club of Maleny Inc Bulletin Vol. 53 No. 6
Wednesday 10th August 2011

THIS WEEK’S MEETING

Maleny Hotel at 6:30pm for 7:00pm.  Guest speaker will be PDG Tony Holmes on "The Role of a Rotary District and District 9600 as an Incorporated Company."

Apologies: Please tender meal apologies to Karen Binstead by noon Tuesday.

DUTY ROSTERS
                         10th Aug       17 Aug        24 Aug
Duty Officer      Jeff C            Ric T           Lloyd L
Registration      Sherry W      Brian K       Andy S
ADO & Scribe   Tony H          Pat K          Keith R
Fellowship         Lynda R        Dick A         Tony L

SAUSAGE SIZZLE ROSTER 20th August

Jeff Cornfoot  John Whan  Tony Holmes    Roly Neiper

LAST WEEK’S MEETING

30 members present plus Ric T's son Scott as a guest. Angela G proposed that the Club should send a message of sympathy to the RC of Oslo following the recent tragic loss of life. Sherryl G then presented to the Club two awards from RI - WELL DONE.

President Mike particularly thanked Sherry W and her team for the great work done at Splendour in the Grass. The anticipated profit will be about $5,000 per Club.  Sherry W then spoke of her views of this Project. Whilst the catering side had run well, she had been very upset that the promise made to the teenagers who volunteered of access to the concerts after their shifts was not honoured. She believed that this behaviour was unethical and should be the subject of a formal complaint.  President Mike said that he would take this up with Rick V.

Sergeant Ric as usual extracted some dubious fines from members.

The Club was privileged to have member Roly Neiper, Chairman of LiveCorp, as the first guest speaker of the year. Roly spoke about the background to the recent banning of the live export trade to  Indonesia.  He covered why this had occurred and the ongoing damage to the cattle industry in Northern Australia.  He explained what steps were available to meet the new requirements of the government.

It was a very interesting and frank assesment of an industry that has been hung out to dry by the federal government.  Roly handled a series of testing questions from members in a very professional manner. This concluded a most interesting presentation.

PRESIDENT MIKE'S ANNOUNCEMENT

President Mike announced that he was, due to personal reasons, relinquishing his post a president and was also resigning from the club. After some discussion Tony Holmes rose and thanked Mike for his efforts on behalf of the club and stated the club's unanimous feelings that we were sorry to see him go.

Mike was then given a round of applause.

FUTURE MEETINGS & EVENTS

8th to 12th August    Bike Ed at Maleny State School.
                                Chris B still needs volunteers!

17th August    Meeting at the Maleny Hotel.  Guest speaker Jim
                        Atkinson on "Youth Exchange Programme".

24th August    Meeting at the Maleny Hotel.  Guest speaker
                       Lionel Tilley on "Bowel Scan Project" and "Job
                       Talk".

31st August    DG's visit - details to be announced.

BIRTHDAYS FOR AUGUST

7th       Peter Wright                       20th  Jocelyn Brooker
12th     Tony Loughnan                  24th  Dick Andrew
17th     Malcolm Baker                  28th  Lionel Tilley

WEDDING ANNIVERSARY FOR AUGUST

29th  Angela and Mike

SPECIAL CONGRATULATIONS

To David and Karen Binstead on the birth of a granddaughter.

STOP PRESS PROGRESSIVE DINNER

Great company, delicious food, a fine(!) wine bar and safe driving and a dive act all combined to make the event most memorable. Jim  & Elaine hosted nibbles & soups presented in cobb loaves (& quick peeks at the TV to catch the rugby score).

On to Roly & Kerry’s where drinks were imbibed (Roly couldn’t

convince anyone that the Rotary wine was anything but paint stripper, so he remains the owner of several bottles of Polio wine). Drinks and lots of conversation, were followed by a delicious meal consisting of several curries. During serving of the meal, Pamela D decided to enliven the evening by attempting a swan dive, with tuck, from the top of the steps. Having only been given a 3 for the dive she lay recumbent upon the carpet whilst her curry commenced to alter the colour of the off white carpet to a decidedly brown curry hue. To the rescue came Sir Galahad Andy S, who hoping to aid the damsel in distress also commenced a dive from the top step only to collide with Beth W on the way down to land upon the ailing Pamela. Beth was knocked sideways into a table on which one Charlotte G was about to commence eating her meal. Charlotte’s meal moved sideways about 3 feet and Beth ended up on her back with a big red scrape near her kidneys. The Niepers turned themselves in instant carpet cleaners, after checking no one wasbadly injured, and everything returned to normal.

Thanks for the show folks.

Malcolm then drove us to Brian and Pamela D’s for lots of cheesy cake desserts & coffee, and plenty more noise and conversation.  Overall a most enjoyable evening thanks to our hosts Jim and Elaine, Roly and Kerry and Brian and Pamela. The safe driving of Malcolm B ensured we arrived on time (although some of the ladies wished to linger and natter) and Brian A. kept us well supplied from the brown paper bag. Thanks to Chris B for the loan of the chairs and cutlery.

And as Samuel Pepys would have it – and so to bed!

Pity about the rugby score!

NOW FOR SOMETHING DIFFERENT

A MAORI TALE

Kia Ora you fullahs (and gidday dingos)

Three Maori’s and three Australians are travelling by train to the Bledisloe Cup match in Auckland . At the station, the three Maori's each buy a ticket and watch as the three Aussies buy just one ticket between them.

"How are the three of you going to travel on only one ticket bro’?" asks one of the Maori's. "Watch and learn" answers one of the Aussies. They all board the train. The Maori's take their respective seats but
all three Aussies cram into a toilet and close the door behind them. Shortly after the train has departed, the conductor comes around collecting tickets. He knocks on the toilet door and says, "Ticket please."

The door opens just a crack and a single arm emerges with a ticket in hand. The conductor takes the ticket and moves on.

The Maori's see this and agree it was quite a clever idea. So after the game, they decide to go one better on the return trip and save some money (being clever with money, and all that and rather spend it on beer!!).

When they get to the station for the return trip, the Aussies buy a single ticket for the return trip. To their astonishment, the Maori's don't buy a ticket at all!!

"How are you going to travel without a ticket?" says one perplexed Aussie.

"Watch and learn bro, " answer the Maori's .

When they board the train the three Maori's cram into a toilet and soon after the three Aussies cram into another nearby. The train departs.

Shortly afterwards, one of the Maori's leaves the toilet and walks over to the toilet where the Aussies are hiding. He knocks on the door and says:

"Ticket please."

Similar to the game really!

7th August 2011

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