"THE RANGE"  Vol. 62 No.8

WEDNESDAY 21St OCTOBER 2020

THIS WEEK'S MEETING
Maleny Hotel at 6:30 for 7:00pm for a Business Meeting.

APOLOGIES AND MEALS
Apologies please to Bernice before noon on Tuesday.

DUTY ROSTERS
                        21st Oct          4th Nov       18th Nov                
Duty Officer    Bernice McL    Fran T         Chris R-S         
Assist DO       Jim A               Alan W        Jeff C                   
Registration    Phillip S          Lionel T        Laurelle O
Fellowship      James McC     Bill H          John McL           

WOOLWORTH SAUSAGE SIZZLE ROSTER
14th November
0730 - 1030  Jim A  Bernice McL  Greg W

1030 - 1330  Brian A  Roly N  Rick V

12th December
TBA

MINUTES OF MEETING OF 7TH OCTOBER
We had a couple of guests at our dinner meeting. Ric T introduced Val France for a second time to our meeting and Jeff C introduced Peter McQuoit who is new to Maleny from Samford. I believe Jeff mentioned that Peter was a volunteer at our Blues Drive-In concert in July.
Val F gave a short account about the group Speak Up Now to combat Domestic Violence and the newly restored Red Bench, outside the post office, which is a collaboration of various groups and the Red Rose Foundation. Most of the work on the bench was done by our tireless Malcolm Baker. There will be the official unveiling of the Red Bench on Friday morning 9th October with Councillor Winston Johnston and Val told us there will be more red benches popping up in Maleny.
Lionel T spoke about the Settlers Green on the Maleny Precinct giving us an update on the trials and tribulations of the installation of Children’s Playground equipment. He also did a plug for the 2021 calendars.
Bernice mentioned about the upcoming Mental Health Day on the 21st October, the same date as our next dinner at the hotel. Everyone is to come wearing a hat, of any description.
Jeff C promoted the End Polio dinner he is organizing at the RSL on 28th October.
Paulette spoke about the vocational night and how everyone seemed to particularly enjoy the wine tasting and pizzas at Finbars/Jen’s Pizza.
The conference on Sunday 8th November which this year will be held in Lawnton was mentioned as we need a minimum of two people from the club to attend, so that we are eligible for apply for district and global grants.
Craig S mentioned Movember and so far, he and Greg W are taking part in this. Greg has already started to grow his moustache for next month, however it wasn’t that noticeable yet.
Paulette also talked about the Maleny Commerce organized Christmas Festival this year being held instead at the showgrounds as a Christmas Music Concert and that the service clubs only will be providing food and Chris B has nominated Rotary to run the bar instead of food as it’s easier and more profitable. Whether this proceeds will depend on the grant that Maleny Commerce has applied for.
Bernice gave us a bit of an update about the Christmas Tree Festival and what is happening instead. She had lost her email about the event however recalled that this year to have a Covid safe event, it had been decided to have videos instead of trees. The theme is HOPE.
Jim A updated us on the Sausage Sizzles and how we have been invited to be included in the roster for the Woolies’ ones. Rotary will replace the Historical Society who have been doing it up to now. It was a unanimous decision to join in these as they are far more profitable than those previously held in Maple Street. So, Saturday 17th October will be our first one and it was decided to have two teams, three
people doing the 7.30 to 10.30am shift and a further three doing the 10.30am to 1.30pm shift.
Chris B conducted the sergeant’s fines in his usual style bringing loads of laughter to the evening.

The highlight of the evening was to see Keith Rogers being awarded a Paul Harris fellowship. As you are reading this, Keith is the person who, with undisputed regularity, puts together this blog every fortnight for all of us to read.

Wayne Litherland from ROMAC (Rotary Oceania Medical Aid for Children) was our guest and speaker for the evening. Since 1988, over 500 children have been assisted in hospitals in Australia and NZ. They now help up to 40-50 children per year from Timor Leste, PNG, Solomon Islands, Fiji and Tonga.
Wayne showed us a video which gave a good coverage of what valuable work ROMAC does. Wayne then related a couple of stories that particularly touched him of children he had encountered and the difference that ROMAC had made to their lives. 
One was the story of Vincent who had not just his first aircraft flight but also his first ride in a car and the puffer jacket they had given him as he was so underdressed for a cold climate which he had never experienced. Later back home on the island, Wayne saw Vincent proudly still wearing his puffer jacket as he played, even though he must have been cooking in it. ROMAC has turned life around for many children over the 32 years.

Paulette gave the vote of thanks.

FUTURE MEETINGS AND EVENTS
23rd October
Train Ride for Polio Day.

28th October
Polio Fund Raising Dinner at the RSL.

4th November
Maleny Hotel at 6:30 for 7:00pm with Guest Speaker Clive Waring on Heritage Photos.

8th November
Rotary Foundation Seminar at St Columban's.

11th November
Board Meeting

18th November
Maleny Hotel at 6:30 for 7:00pm for AGM.

WEDDING ANNIVERSARY FOR OCTOBER
26th Rick and Cilla

BIRTHDAYS FOR OCTOBER
12th Gloria Rogers  14th Keith Rogers  16th Kerry Neiper  28th Bernice McLennan  30th Andy Schouteten  31st Gillian Allen

AND NOW FOR SOMETHING DIFFERENT 

This is the first time I have heard about Paraprosdokians. Paraprosdokians are figures of speech in which the latter part of a sentence or phrase is surprising or unexpected and is frequently humorous. Groucho Marx used the form frequently.

1. Where there's a will, I want to be in it.

 2. The last thing I want to do is hurt you ... but it's still on my list.

 3. Since light travels faster than sound, some people appear bright until you hear them speak.

 4. If I agreed with you, we'd both be wrong.

 5. We never really grow up -- we only learn how to act in public.

 6. War does not determine who is right, only who is left.

 7. Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit. Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.

 8. To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism. To steal from many is research.

9. I didn't say it was your fault, I said I was blaming you.

10. In filling out an application, where it says, "In case of emergency, notify... " I answered " a doctor."

 11. Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are sexy.

12. You do not need a parachute to skydive. You only need a parachute to skydive twice.

13. I used to be indecisive, but now I’m not so sure.

14. To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first and call whatever you hit the target.

Rotary Club of Maleny Bulletin for 4th March 2015

"THE RANGE"  Vol. 56 No. 16

WEDNESDAY 4TH MARCH 2015

THIS WEEK'S MEETING
Maleny Hotel at 6:30 for 7:00pm with Guest Speaker Rich Hungerford on Bush Lore Australia.

APOLOGIES
Please tender apologies to Bernice by noon Tuesday.

DUTY ROSTERS
                             4 Mar                18 Mar               1 Apr            
                   
Duty Officer         Alan W              Angela G           Jeff C     

ADO & Scribe      Mike G              Lionel T             Robin T

Registration         Bernice McL     Malcolm B          Bill H            

Fellowship           Rick V              John McL           John W
      
SAUSAGE SIZZLE ROSTER

14th March
Michael G (Leader)  Sherryl G  Chris B

28th March
Jim A (Leader)  Bill H   Ric T

11th April
Angela G (Leader)  Donna C  Andy S

MINUTES OF MEETING OF 18TH FEBRUARY
The President opened the meeting on Chinese New Year, welcoming the Year of the Sheep/Goat and jointly celebrating with his wife Jacinta who had forgone a family celebration in order to attend this meeting with Ric.

A warm welcome was extended to several guests Ram Krishna, a Rotarian from Nepal with his local supporters, Gail and Dee; one of our Paul Harris Fellows, Fran Tickle, Rotarian Brian Mason from Caloundra Pacific Club who would talk later about ROMAC, and Philip Stark, a prospective new member.  Nice to see so many women (9 in all) at the meeting, which turned out to be one of the best in recent months.

After the usual formalities, several Directors gave updates on the Club’s many projects and made some announcements:
1. The decision to sponsor the running costs of a Blackall Range Care Group car for 3 years at $1500 per annum.
2. Progress on supporting the Mens’ Shed sign
3. The community grants program
4. The Time Capsule
5. The Green Bags project, which now needed to be checked out with local retail stores
6. The need for a new member of the Calendar Committee to replace Lionel who would be travelling this year
7. The invitation to the 10 year anniversary celebration of North Blackall Range Probus Club (Members to advise Bernice if they intend to go).
8. The upcoming deadline of 28 February for District Grants
9. The reminder to pay membership fees (a bargain at $140).

After an excellent meal and the Sergeant’s usual fund raiser session, Rotarian Brian Mason updated us all about ROMAC and how valuable a project it is in changing lives by arranging treatment for diseases and deformities that could never be cured in countries such as PNG, The Solomon Islands, Vanuatu etc.

Finally, we were treated to the very interesting story of the life so far of our new member (though a Rotarian for 5 years) Chris Ross Smith whose passion in life is acting and the theatre. Educated in South Africa during the challenging apartheid years he learned such skills as hut building and, at the Gordonstoun equivalent senior school, the necessity to walk in groups of 3 in the bush so if one kid was bitten by a snake, one could go for help and the other could stay until the bitten kid died! While at University in Pietermaritzburg, as a white person he courageously demonstrated against apartheid.

After teaching for a short time in South Africa he left for England and got a scholarship to the London Drama School. Various voice coaching and acting related teaching in Zimbabwe and USA eventually led him to a senior lecturer role at the University of Cape Town where uniquely the segregation of the community was transformed into integrated voices during his courses.

Later he settled in Armidale working at the University of New England. Chris has been retired for 15 years and very sensibly recently moved to Maleny, which is a fifth the size of Armidale but had 5 times the number of cafes.

The final message at the end of a very vibrant, fun and interesting evening was to let Bernice know numbers for The Falls vocational visit the following week.

FUTURE MEETINGS & EVENTS

11th March
Board Meeting at the Masonic Hall.

18th March
Maleny Hotel at 6:30 for 7:00pm with Guest Speaker George Trembath on the Pachacuti Project.

25th March
Project Meeting at the Masonic Hall with $10 meal.

1st April
Maleny Hotel at 6:30 for 7:00pm with Guest Speaker Morag Gamble on the Ethos Foundation.

BIRTHDAYS FOR MARCH

5th Judy Tilley  17th Lloyd Larney  26th Rick Vickers

WEDDING ANNIVERSARY FOR MARCH

6th John & Beth Wann

NOW FOR SOMETHING DIFFERENT
SOME REMEMBRANCES OF HOME SCHOOLING

Most of our generation was HOME SCHOOLED in many ways.

1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.
"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning the house."
2. My mother taught me RELIGION.
"You better pray that will come out of the carpet."
3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!"
4. My mother taught me LOGIC.
" Because I said so, that's why."
5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC.
"If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me."
6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT.
"Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."
7. My mother taught me IRONY.
"Keep crying and I'll give you something to cry about."
8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.
"Shut your mouth and eat your supper."
9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.
"Just you look at that dirt on the back of your neck?"
10. My mother taught me about STAMINA.
"You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."
11 My mother taught me about WEATHER.
"This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."
12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.
"If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!"
13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
"I brought you into this world, and I can take you out..."
14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOUR MODIFICATION.
"Stop acting like your father!"
15. My mother taught me about ENVY.
"There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do."
16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION.
"Just wait until we get home."
17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING.
"You are going to get it from your father when you get home!"
18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.
"If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to get stuck that way."
19. My mother taught me ESP.
"Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?"
20. My mother taught me HUMOUR.
"When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me."
21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT.
"If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."
22. My mother taught me GENETICS.
"You're just like your father."
23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS.
"Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?"
24. My mother taught me WISDOM.
"When you get to be my age, you'll understand.
25. My mother taught me about JUSTICE.
"One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you!"